I happened upon a friend of mine who was researching food addiction. She ran across this website with a quiz that offered to tell me whether or not I was addicted to food.
Now, I’m not the most serene person you will ever meet. If I have a bad headache for long enough, then according to my anxiety level, I have cancer. No, I’m not exaggerating. In light of this information, taking a quiz about whether or not I am addicted to food seems like a great idea…right?
Addicted to Food and the Panic
There were 20 questions on this quiz. As my friend and I read through the list, we kept answering “yes.” Seriously, to every single question.
Oh my word, I thought. How could I be addicted to food and not know it? How could my therapist of 11 years seriously not tell me this?
I guess on some level, I figured I wasn’t really addicted to food. Have I used food as a coping mechanism? Oh yeah, absolutely. Have I always struggled with my weight? Sure. Have I binged in the past on a regular basis? Yep. Do I have a distorted body image thanks to childhood sexual abuse? Oh yeah.
But addicted to food? No.
I Panicked and Then Made Jokes
However, the thing about anxiety is that it doesn’t respond to reason. I knew that after 11 years, my therapist and I would have worked on food addiction if it was an issue for me.
The panic didn’t care. It bloomed in my chest. My heart raced and I could not focus. To try and head off a full-blown panic attack, I started to make jokes – not about food addiction, but about how I get my low-self-esteem-self into trouble taking online quizzes.
And an article for Sweatpants & Coffee was born! Plus, I had therapy the very next day – oh, timing is everything – and I incorporated our conversation into the article. Along with one of the BEST guided meditations you can EVER take (if you don’t mind swears…)
Here’s an excerpt of Anxiety and How I Was Addicted to Everything:
If you do it right, you can be addicted to everything.
By “it,” I mean taking online quizzes. I have been diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, anxiety, depression, and – wait for it – low self-esteem. I tend to avoid rejection. I’m attracted to low-risk situations in which I get the answer “yes” on a regular basis.
There’s no better place to get a “yes” than online quizzes. Some great examples:
“Are you too dramatic for your own good?” Yes. Shocker, I know.
“Are you a real bro’s bro?” Yes. So I’m not a dude. What.
“Are you addicted to food?” Yes. Wait, what?
I tucked that tidbit away from my therapist, with whom I have been meeting for eleven years. At my next counseling appointment, I said, “I’m addicted to food and you didn’t even bother to tell me?”